I understand football is a religion in this state. I get that. There's a lot of stupid in this state so really, what's one more stupid obsession. But c'mon people... this is absurd. The Cowboys are just not worthy of this kind of attention. Maybe if they won something every now and then, but they have been a mediocre (at best) franchise for more than 15 years now. Seriously...
A few nights ago, when there was no pre-season game playing and no major news, the local CBS affiliate still led their sports with the Cowboys. Never mind that the Texas Rangers, who currently have the best record in the American League, are playing some damn fine baseball and have been a pretty dominating presence in the MLB for the past few years.
In fact, I did a quick review of pro sports teams in the Dallas Fort Worth area and how they stacked up against the Cowboys since 1995 (the last time the Cowboys won a championship). I looked at the records of pretty much all the significant teams in the five major sports (Football, Baseball, Hockey, Basketball, and Soccer) based in the DFW area. The teams looked at are as follows:
| Dallas Cowboys |
| Dallas Mavericks |
| Dallas Stars |
| FC Dallas |
| Texas Rangers |
| Dallas Sidekicks |
| Fort Worth Fire |
| Fort Worth/Texas Brahmas |
| Fort Worth Cats |
| Grand Prairie AirHogs |
The Cowboys have appeared in the postseason 7 times since their last championship. That's good for 7th place. Now keep in mind that of the three teams the Cowboys beat out (AirHogs, Fire, Rangers), the AirHogs haven't even existed for 7 seasons and the Fire lasted for 7 total.
The Cowboys have won 2 games/series in the postseason. That's dead last. Every other team has had at least one more successful postseason than the Cowboys.
The Cowboys are the only team in this list to NOT MAKE THEIR SPORT'S CHAMPIONSHIP GAME. That's right, since the 1995 Super Bowl (yeah, I used the term "Super Bowl"... fuck you NFL and your trademark copyright bullshit), every other notable team in the DFW area has made the final game or series for their respective league EXCEPT "America's Team."
And of those other 9 teams, FC Dallas and the Rangers are the only teams to not bring home the trophy. But hey, at least they had a real shot, which is more than we can say for the Cowdopes.
Hell, earlier this year, whatever idiot runs the Dallas Cowboys' Twitter page shoved his cleat firmly in his mouth which the Dallas Stars' Twitter page removed and shoved in the Cowboys' ass:
"At least our #9 got the job done..... RT:" @DallasCowboys Similarly in the category of nobody-cares…the NHL is back!" pic.twitter.com/06y0e6iG"
Burn. Served. Nicely done, hockey dudes.
And we COULD even mention local college and high school teams that have been more relevant on a national level than the Cowboys, but I just don't give enough of a fuck to do that kind of research (although TCU did win the fucking Rose Bowl... I'm not sure the Cowboys could win the Rose Bowl at this point).
I don't know which is more pathetic... that the local media can't stop talking about every minute detail of a mediocre football team instead of giving more coverage to teams that are currently not sucking or that there is apparently enough local interest by sports enthusiasts for trivial Cowboys related bullshit that the ratings for said bullshit support the media gangbang.
My toddler really likes "Wheel of Fortune." He couldn't watch it last night because that station had to air AN HOUR OF PRE-GAME BULLSHIT BEFORE THE COWBOYS PRE-SEASON GAME. That is just fucking asinine. People actually watch that shit? How sad is your life that an hour long Pre-Pre-Season Game program is worth watching? I've been a literal fanatic about teams before (like TCU before they pissed me off once too many times), but Christ... I can think of hundreds of things I'd rather do than watch an hour long program about the meaningless 3 hour program that follows it. What could POSSIBLY be so important that it needs its own program instead of using it as time filler during the game when there is plenty of "players standing around looking at each others sweat stained uniforms" time.
In a related note, I really want to slap that shit-eating grin off Tony Romo's face. He's done nothing to warrant that cocky fucking look he flashes around.
Also related, I can't wait until Dale Hansen dies because that jackass is the ultimate Cowboys ball licker (although Babe Laufenberg is giving him a real run for the money, but at least Babe PLAYED for the Cowboys at one point). And to make matters worse, if Dale can't find some asinine crap about the Cowboys to report, he'll just talk about golf. Once, he talked about Tony Romo playing golf and I nearly went nuclear. Dale Hansen is an egotistical douchebag. That isn't necessarily relevant to anything right now, but I enjoy taking every opportunity to point that out.
